性爱巴士

Inclusion

Jaime Eden

She/Her

Page Designer, Design Studio – 性爱巴士 | USA TODAY NETWORK

 

People tend to vilify difficult emotions, but they are just as important to our humanity as the easy ones. In my darkest moments as a scared, gay, closeted trans girl, anger was my life vest. Justified anger, that I deserved better than the way my family and society treated me. Even when I didn鈥檛 feel deserving of better treatment, I compartmentalized. I decided that no matter how down I felt, my actions would reflect the fact that I deserved better. And that anger at my family鈥檚 and the world鈥檚 injustices pushed me to force change in my life. To take small step after small step, until I was in a better plac

A mantra that I live by is鈥

鈥淚 am too full of life to be half-loved.鈥
Ijeoma Umebinyuo, Questions for Ada

While my anger on my own behalf helped keep me afloat, every action I made in that space was for love. Anger and love may seem far apart from one another but in my heart, they often work in tandem. I was angry, am angry, because I knew I deserved love. To give and take of love until I was bursting at the seams with it.

In the end, that is why I was angry in the first place. Because what should be and what was happening were so far apart from one another, and to no fault of my own. The contrast between the love I deserved and the hatred I received was so vast it was maddening.

The things that set me apart are the things that make me beautiful.

I deserve to shout it from the rooftops and leave my mark on every canvas. Any abusive family member, angry mob, or unjust system that disagrees has no place in my life, no space in my heart.

My humanity is not up for debate. I am not a morning show debate topic or the boogeyman in the closet.

I will even reject tolerance, because I deserve to be cherished. I enjoy my own company and would rather be subject to loneliness than disrespect. That belief shines through everything I do, and the special people by my side are here because of it. Radical self-love breeds more of the same, and I would take the right crowd over the large one any day of the week.

Because I am too full of life to be half-loved.

Pride Month

June is Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender Pride Month, established to recognize the impact that LGBTQ+ individuals have had on the world. In celebration, 性爱巴士 will uplift and celebrate LGBTQ+ voices throughout the month.

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